For example, most best man speeches have a bit of humor in them for levity and to get the crowd going. But if this really isn’t for you and making jokes just feels too forced, you don’t have to follow that convention. On the other hand, if you’re known for your humor and sarcasm, you don’t have to force yourself to be overly sentimental. Just a few words of honest sentiment would get the message across without making you feel like you’re faking it. If public speaking is not for you, don’t be nervous about it. You can even make a joke about how much you love public speaking, or about how this is the groom’s way of punishing you/getting you back for that time you made him push your car up a hill.
Though your speech should be well prepared in advance, take a look at the crowd; if people are particularly restless or eager to drink and dance, then you may want to cut out that second anecdote you weren’t sure about. Though it’s typical for the best man and maid of honor to give a speech, there may be other speeches given out there. The father of the bride sometimes speaks, and there may be two maids of honor and thus, two speeches. And maybe even drunk Uncle Bertie will try to say a few words. If there are a number of speeches, then it’s especially important to keep it short so the crowd doesn’t spend all night listening to people talk.
Don’t be embarrassed about keeping a written version of your speech with you when you go up there during your big moment. Even if you don’t use it as a reference, just having it there can make you feel more confident about not making any mistakes.
Remember that people often videotape best man’s speeches. You don’t want yourself looking sloppy on camera for all of eternity.
Depending on how the reception goes, someone else may introduce you and you won’t have to do this part. But be prepared in advance in case you’re given the microphone and find that your audience isn’t exactly rapt.
“For those of you who don’t know me, I’m Brian, [groom’s name here]’s little brother. " “I’m Jake, [groom’s name here]’s best friend. I’ve known him since the seventh grade, and I’ve known [bride’s name here] ever since their second date. " “I’m Danny, [groom’s name here]’s best friend. I’ve known [groom’s name] and [bride’s name] ever since our freshman year of college. We all lived in the same hall. "
It’s also nice to thank the guests for being there. You can also thank the bridal party. Optionally, you can also thank the bridesmaids. Mention what great friends they have been for the bride and tell them how lovely they look. You can play this for laughs a bit as long as you don’t come off sounding like a total creep. You can say something about the lovely color of the dresses, how big of a help they’ve been during the wedding, and whatever else you can say that is quick and tasteful.
Remember that half of the people in the room may not know each other. People should be able to find your speech funny and moving without knowing the groom or hearing an excessive amount of detail about someone they don’t know. Of course, if it’s a more intimate wedding and it seems like most people do know each other, then you can go into a bit more detail, if you like. If you’re the groom’s brother, you can joke around about how he used to tease you mercilessly when you were little, or how you used to give him a hard time. You can also make a joke about how not much has changed in that regard. Remember to keep up a nice emotional balance. You should have as many sweet and heartfelt comments about the groom as jokes. [4] X Research source
Tell a funny story. This will not only break up the formality of the ceremony, but also help endear the couple to the audience. A great way to grab everyone’s attention would be to introduce it by saying “I’m about to let you in on a secret about the groom” or “the groom begged me not to include this story in my speech but I simply had to. " Alternatively, tell a touching story. A particularly appropriate story might describe how the bride and groom met or something sweet that helped move their relationship forward. Since you are the groom’s best friend, this might be a good place to describe how you watched him fall head-over-heels for the bride. If you can’t think of any appropriate stories or don’t know the bride well enough to include her in one, make some observations about love or marriage in general, or about the groom’s feelings for the bride. Even if you haven’t spent a lot of time with the bride, you can make observations about the first time the groom told you about the bride, or what the groom said about their first date.
Though you want to choose a humorous anecdote, make sure it is appropriate for everyone; the last thing you want is to come across as humiliating or mean-spirited. If you mention that time when the groom and bride broke off their engagement for three weeks or talk about how much more fun your best friend used to be before he got with his “ball and chain,” then his wife may never forgive you. You don’t want to sever your relationship, or put it in question, over something like saying a few thoughtless words in a speech. Don’t make it a speech about how you first really didn’t like your buddy’s wife and then came around, either. And lastly, do not think it’s funny to insult the venue or the food. Someone shelled out a lot of hard-earned cash for what you might think are tacky Christmas lights or rubbery chicken.
You can talk about something the groom did for you. Say something like, “I’ll never forget the time Mark helped me move across the country to follow my dream. I couldn’t have done it without him. " It’s completely normal to find this part a little embarrassing. Just remember that this is your buddy’s day, and no one’s going to laugh at you for getting a little sappy.
If you don’t know the bride very well, that’s okay. Instead of saying that bluntly, you can say something like, “Though I haven’t spent as much time with Mary as I would have liked, I could tell right away that she was right for Jeff. "
Say something like, “Even when Mary and Jeff are on the opposite side of a room, you can feel them looking out for each other. They don’t have to be glued together to have such a strong, incredible bond. " You can also make a comment about how much you admire their relationship and have always looked for a love as strong as theirs (if you’re single). If you’re married, you can share some thoughts on marriage and why the groom and bride are a great match. You don’t have to overdo it and say they are a perfect pair, meant for each other, soul mates, or the like, if you don’t really feel that way. You can mention the strengths of their relationship without making it sound too forced.
Don’t force yourself to do this unless you find one that’s really fitting. There’s another one that goes, “Marriage isn’t about looking at each other. It’s about looking outward in the same direction. "
You can say something like, “Ladies and gentlemen, I’d like to propose a toast to Mary and Jeff. May they have years of joy, happiness, and health ahead of them. " You can also say something like, “Here’s to a lifetime of happiness for Mary and Jeff. " If the bride took the groom’s last name, you can propose the toast to “Mr. and Mrs. Thompson. "
